This is both one of the hardest and easiest questions to answer.
When I started The Clearbrook Murders almost three years ago, I was at my most emotional. I felt voiceless and powerless. I didn’t understand my feelings, I couldn’t name my emotions, and I didn’t know why I felt the way I did. It felt like my mind was working overtime and sometimes I struggled just to keep my head above water. Even though sometimes it felt easier to let myself sink. Writing was my liferaft.
I heard an interesting quote awhile back that said:
“We are writers, my love. We don’t cry, we bleed on paper.” -a.y.
I can’t think of a better answer the question ‘why do you write?’ Writing is oddly cathartic. Writing gave me a way to confront my emotions, it allowed me to name my fears. Anxiety. Depression. Guilt. Lonliness. Most importantly, it allowed me to stand up to those feelings. Writing was freeing, like loosening the shackles that weighed me down. And honestly, it gave me the opportunity to reveal my voice, even if I couldn’t do it out loud. Sometimes life is hard to face head on, and we look for ways to escape it. Even if it’s just for a moment. Writing did that for me.